Tag Archives: Horoscopes

Spring Horoscopes

By: Alisen Hazeltine

Capricorn: (22 December – 20 January)

Lucky Numbers: 16, 35, 9, 14, 20

You are more than likely to become overwhelmed with stress. Try to maintain your temper and not take it out on other people. Remain forgiving and open minded toward any situation.


Aquarius: (21 January – 19 February)

Lucky Numbers: 23, 15, 19, 4, 49

In the next month or so, you will experience a dilemma. Be on the lookout for others who try to disturb your happiness. Remain loyal to your true companions.


Pisces: (20 February – 20 March)

Lucky Numbers: 8, 54, 18, 6, 11

You are in for a load of adventure in your near future. Always look for the good in every situation. Focus on making wonderful memories with the people closest to you.


Aries: (21 March – 19 April)

Lucky Numbers: 1, 12, 34, 58, 26

Be very patient with those around you. Overtime, you may notice that things will work out in your favor. You may want to distance yourself from those that have bad intentions.


Taurus: (20 April – 20 May)

Lucky Numbers: 3, 14, 21, 30, 43

You will meet that special someone very soon. Keep your heart open to all possibilities. For all roses have their thorns, you just have to appreciate its beauty.


Gemini: (21 May – 21 June)

Lucky Numbers: 5, 39, 33, 44, 10

With a heaping amount of events in your future, remain level headed. Stay on task and plan ahead. Keep yourself organized and relaxed in the next few weeks.


Cancer: (22 June – 23 July)

Lucky Numbers: 13, 22, 20, 42, 17

Be prepared for bad news in your near future. But, keep your head up and push through anything that comes your way. In the end, everything will come together and your path will run smoothly.


Leo: (24 July – 23 August)

Lucky Numbers: 9, 27, 52, 38, 21

You are in for a world of new experiences to help better yourself and your future. You will make new friends and find new hobbies. Make everyday a chance to help others in big or little ways.


Virgo: (24 August – 22 September)

Lucky Numbers: 6, 29, 50, 62, 41

This season, kick back and relax. You should make time for yourself and with your friends. You will feel replenished with energy and your mood will enhance dramatically. Be happy.


Libra: (23 September – 22 October)

Lucky Numbers: 3, 15, 24, 21, 36

You may experience mood swings as people test your patience. Remember to take a breath and clear your mind if it ever becomes too much. You are strong and can make it through anything.


Scorpio: (23 October – 22 November)

Lucky Numbers: 9, 0, 15, 24, 32

You will experience some trouble in your love life. Remember your self-worth and do what’s best for you. There’s plenty of fish in the sea.


Sagittarius: (23 November – 20 December)

Lucky Numbers: 11, 56, 32, 23, 2

This is a great time to declutter your life. This may involve cleaning out your closet or working through your problems. Be aware of what is important to you and what you wish to accomplish.



By: Logan Eadie

Aries: Mar 21-Apr 19

Get your Netflix warmed up, because you’ll be using it a lot; whether it is alone or with someone else – it’s up to you…

Lucky #’s- 12, 5, 174, 0.01, -17

Taurus: Apr 20-May 20

Everything will go wrong today; including this horoscope. Be wary of emails claiming to be from PayPal or eBay – they are almost certainly your friends trying to get a rise out of you. In fact, they’re probably watching you from a webcam placed somewhere around the room you’re currently in. We’re 99% sure that’s where these scam emails come from – people YOU know.

Lucky #’s- 540, 46, 52, 78, -0.00000000001

Gemini: May 21-Jun 20

Today will be full of computer related mishaps; you will not have automatically saved the document you’d been working on for the past four hours.

Lucky #’s- 1, 2, 3, 4, 6

Cancer: Jun 21-Jul 22

Cancelling a direct-debit may land you in hot water with an authority. Tomatoes can be your best friend – go Red for the day. * This horoscope is not sponsored by Heinz, or the Communist Party.

Lucky #’s- 0.1, 0.44, 0.365, 0.25874, 0

Leo: Jul 23-Aug 22

As the fella once said, ain’t that a kick in the head. Not that you’ll be kicked in the head; it’s a metaphor. I mean, for all I know you *are* going to get kicked in the head, so maybe just wear a helmet for the rest of the day.

Lucky #’s- 11, 22, 33, 44, 55

Virgo: Aug 23-Sep 22

Today is not your lucky day. It’s tomorrow instead! So, that’s something to look forward to whilst you’re picking up your teeth with your broken arm.

Lucky #”s- 9, 44, 76, 021, 3.015

Libra: Sep 23-Oct 22

The Nigerian investors you just gave $150 to aren’t real; better call Saul.

Lucky #’s- 150, ∞, ¾, 7, 89

Scorpio: Oct 23-Nov 21

Whilst you may think that this horoscope is completely useless… I have to admit – I have a big secret. You see, all horoscopes are completely useless.

Lucky #-  : A=3 B=4 C=5

Sagittarius: Nov 22-Dec 21

You won’t be hospitalized today, but things may not go as planned. Watch for falling pianos.

Lucky #’s- 3, 6, 9, 12, 1

Capricorn: Dec 22-Jul 19

This month provides you with the greatest chance of making it. So pray to the planets that they stay in alignment or this horoscope will not be fulfilled.

Lucky #’s- 21, 22, 47, 5, 3

Aquarius: Jan 20-Feb 18

Chasing cats and dogs around the streets after midnight is probably not the best way to meet your new neighbors.

Lucky #’s- 0.2, -0.258, 1414, 548, 3

Pisces: Feb 19-Mar 20

You may never find what you’re looking for, but at least you managed to find that picture of the chimp sitting on a toilet reading a newspaper. Romantic evenings are much overrated. Instead of romance, think about food.

Lucky #’s- 2222222222, 99, 875, 757, 1

December Horoscopes

By: Christine Kuzminski

Aries: (March 21-April 19) This has been your lucky month, Aries. Things seem to be going well and peace has been brought into your life. Enjoy the rest of your month and keep smiling!

Taurus: (April 20-May 20) Taurus, your month has been a little overwhelming. Take a deep breath and relax, the holiday break will bring you peace.

Gemini: (May 21-June 20) Your month has consisted of a strict routine, Gemini. At times this routine can get very boring and tedious. Take some time to do something different and mix it up. You won’t regret it.

Cancer: (June 21-July 22) Sadly, this hasn’t been your best month, Cancer. Bad luck has come your way and it doesn’t seem to be getting better. But, don’t worry; the New Year will bring you great luck!

Leo: (July 23-August 22) This month you may be feeling anxious for the New Year. But, Leo, don’t be too eager, great things come in all good timing. Enjoy the holiday break and relax.

Virgo: (August 23-Semptember 22) This month has brought many frustrations your way, Virgo. Take the time to rejoice the little things and a better mood will find you!

Libra: (September 23-October 22) It has been an emotional month for you, Libra. Try not to let things bother you, for happiness is coming your way!

Scorpio: (October 23-November 21) This has been a busy month for you, Scorpio. Just when it seems to be time to slow down and relax, something else pops up! Keep up that great energy; a lot of success will come your way.

Sagittarius: (November 22-December 21) You are having a successful month, Sagittarius. Enjoy all that comes with your hard work, but don’t let it go to your head.

Capricorn: (December 22-January 19) A new love for someone or something has come your way this month, Capricorn. Enjoy it and don’t be scared to take chances, for the New Year is just around the corner.

Aquarius: (January 20-February 18) The month of December brings many new faces into your life, Aquarius. Some will be more memorable than others. Keep your eyes peeled.

Pisces: (February 19-March 20) This month has got you drained, Pisces, but it has been completely worth it. You have put a lot of time and effort into something and now it is finally finished. Take time to relax and celebrate your hard work.