By: Leah Morrison  

     They grew up in Ferguson, a small town in Missouri where the unimaginable happened in a short amount of time. Phineas Smith died.

Autumn and Phineas (Finny) were inseparable as young kids, but people change, and friends grow apart. Only Autumn wishes they could have been more. The two friends slowly fade out of friendship after a kiss they shared in eighth grade. They each find different friend groups and have long-term dating relationships. Despite that, their childhood bond remains, and their attraction for each other grows. As Autumn deals with the ins and outs of high school, family difficulties, and depression, Finny is always on her mind. He’s also always there to support her in hard times. At the end of senior year, Autumn’s boyfriend breaks up with her, and Finny’s girlfriend travels to Europe. The old friends start to spend lots of time together. Will they tell each other how they really feel? Will it be too late? 

     When you have something to tell someone, who do you go to: a parent, grandparent, sibling, a best friend? Your best friend is someone who you can be the best version of yourself around, without judgement, or worry if they will laugh, because they are the person that will laugh with you not at you. Autumn and Finny were just like that, but things happen, emotions collide, and people change. This novel is not only emotional, but it is real and from the heart of the author, Laura Nowlin.  If He Had Been with Me, is contemporary romance that also includes important themes like mental health and coming of age. This novel holds many emotions, including heartbreak, sorrow, but, most of all, love. It is a story between two people with an almost forgotten friendship, a tale full of missed chances and what could have been if he had been with me.  

     This novel holds a place on the New York Times bestseller list, as number one in Young Adult Paperback. Based off reviews from Goodreads, it has an average of four and a half stars out of five. One reader reviewed the novel, sharing, “This book made me sob, it was so heartwarming and sad at the same time. I kid you not, when I finished reading, I was just staring at a wall wondering what to do next. I cannot wait for the sequel to come out. This book is a five star I loved it so much!” There are so many more reviews just like this, showing that the book is truly amazing. 

     This novel is one of the best books I have read, and I have read many novels. It played with my emotions back and forth, from anger to sadness, back to anger, and, finally, happiness at the end. I believe that this novel is perfect for teenagers and young adults, because it relates to so many things that teens and adults go through, and it pulls you in because it relates to something personal to every reader. I believe that Laura Nowlin did a fantastic job writing this novel. If you have read this novel, she is currently releasing a new novel called If Only I had Told Her as a sequel to If He had Been with Me, which shows Finny’s point of view as the first novel shows Autumns point of view. If these novels sound appealing to you, check local bookstores, Walmart, or your local library.